


Messes We Find Ourselves In

by mmmdraco



Category: Hikaru no Go
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-19
Updated: 2014-03-19
Packaged: 2018-01-16 08:27:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1338733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mmmdraco/pseuds/mmmdraco
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are two ways in which a stone may be played: one which hides its importance, and one which doesn't bother hiding at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Messes We Find Ourselves In

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ver (verloren1983)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/verloren1983/gifts).



There were lips at the base of his throat and a hand on his cock and Shinichirou didn't quite remember how it happened this time. There had been a bar involved, one of those where the counters were perpetually sticky and the clientele was more old men than young ones. He'd had two drinks, a double something or other and a beer, and it had been quick to go to his head. Someone familiar had been around, someone he'd trusted enough to help him into a car and drive him home, someone he'd trusted enough to proposition if the hard length against his ass was any indication. "I don't have any condoms here," he managed to mutter out despite the distraction of the calluses on those strong fingers sliding against his balls, glad to know he had the presence of mind to stay safe.

"I've got one," the man muttered and Shinichirou could hear the rustle of the package and the grunt the man made as he slipped the condom on. Shinichirou made himself reach back to double check that the latex was actually in place only to inhale sharply as he caught sight of the face of the man. Still, the quiet burn of his blood through his veins and the cock in his hand and the promise of pleasure made him nod consent and gasp sharply as he was breached slowly. 

The first few moments of thrusting were nothing special. There was pleasure without anything enough like pain to name it with that term, but it was when the man's hands gripped his hips, pulling him back and holding him as the angle was straightened just enough that his prostate was being nudged, that Shinichirou breathed a cautious sigh of relief as the encounter turned to something that promised a happy ending to the evening. "I like your chuuban," he managed to moan out, his own hand moving down to grip his neglected cock, thumb running through his precome to spread it over the head of his cock with a soft grunt. 

"And for a 3-dan, you've got a great ass." The thumbs of both hands holding him traced back to the mentioned object.

Shinichirou was tipsy enough that he didn't think he was going to hold out much longer, but there was something that needed to be said before he allowed himself release. "I'm a 4-dan," he said, tension filling his voice as he was overwhelmed by his release. The energy seemed to flow from him as far as his come had, leaving him with his arms propping up his head and his knees spreading wider with each of the man's thrusts. He was asleep only a moment later.

* * *

It had been almost two weeks since his little one night stand. Shinichirou hadn't exactly been surprised to wake up alone the next morning, but he had been surprised not to run into the man at the Ki-in since then. Still, since the man was a title holder, he was far more in demand than Shinichirou. They were going to meet up again at some point and Shinichirou wasn't sure how to play it. In the end, he did what he could to plot ahead based on the most likely course of play by his opponent.

What he hadn't expected was for a casual walk through the small museum in the Ki-in to result in him coming face to face with the man. "Ogata-sensei. What brings you down here?" 

The older man adjusted his tie as he looked at him. "Isumi 3-dan. Sorry, 4-dan. I'm killing a little time before I give an interview to Weekly Go. I was hoping to get my blood pumping, but this isn't doing it for me." He looked Shinichirou over. "If you've got twenty minutes, though, I think we could get in some rousing exercise together."

Shinichirou was glad that the come on was obvious, like a stone slapped into formation in the most frenetic part of battle rather than the chuuban stone that only showed its importance later on. He nodded and followed as the older man led him to the restroom. There was more groping than making out that happened to start it and Shinichirou was sure that it was a horrible idea to be doing this where anyone could just walk in. Still, if Ochi could be undisturbed, then so could Shinichirou as long as he kept his voice down. 

"Don't give me love bites, kid. You want to use your mouth? Go lower." Shinichirou smiled, even as he was called _kid_. If Ogata wanted that, of course Shinichirou was happy to oblige. "Still carrying around a condom?" He held out his hand.

Ogata glared at him. "For a blow job? Hardly. Fine, if you're not going to use your mouth, use your hands. Maybe I'll oblige you, as well."

Ten minutes later as he washed his hands and tried to catch his breath, Shinichirou smiled. If obligation felt like that, he was happy to engage in it. Ogata had left the restroom only a few moments earlier, but he had done so only after handing over one of his business cards with his personal number scrawled on it. Shinichirou wasn't sure what to make of it, but he tucked it in his wallet quickly after adding the number to his phone, realizing in that moment that he was five minutes late to meet Yoshitaka and Hikaru for lunch.

"Sorry!" he yelled as he approached the pair. "I got held up." It wasn't really a lie. Ogata had actually held him up against the wall as his knees had gone weak when he'd come, but he wasn't going to go yelling out all of the details.

"Finally," Hikaru said, he shoulders slouching as he headed toward the door. "You should pay for lunch for being late."

Having already seem inside his wallet a moment before, Shinichirou nodded. "I always seem to end up paying anyway."

Yoshitaka shoved his hands deeper into his pockets and nudged Shinichirou with his elbow. "Is that your way of saying you want be my Papa?"

"You're too young. Would you even know how to take care of me if I paid you to date me?" Shinichirou followed after Hikaru, not sure he wanted to hear Yoshitaka's answer. Right now, he had to find out where Hikaru was trying to take them. If he had to pay, he'd rather have ramen than sushi, but he had been hoping for burgers today. If Yoshitaka replied, Shinichirou didn't hear it.

* * *

"I figured you would call," Ogata said to Shinichirou the next time the were alone together which happened to once again be in a restroom at the Ki-in.

Shinichirou felt his face heat up. "I wasn't sure that's what you wanted. If didn't seem like you wanted to wine and dine me."

Ogata laughed and reached out to caress Shinichirou's hip. "Call me if you're horny and don't want to waste a tissue. This thing we've got? I like it. You're low maintenance but fun."

Somehow, that's all it took to make him comfortable with it. It wasn't a one night stand, but it wasn't a relationship. There was no coersion, but neither did he feel like he wasn't wanted. He wasn't in love, but he had a place to go if he needed to work off nervous energy.

They ended up at a lot of places together. There were other restrooms in the Ki-in as well as a supply closet where they ended up knocking over a shelving unit. Shinichirou had gone to Ogata's place a few times. There was a particularly memorable time in a love hotel where Ogata had pushed him through the corridors quickly as a woman called out, "Seiji?" He'd taken to buying flavored condoms to keep with him for their encounters, never knowing when or where they'd do whatever it was they would do. Never did he think that Ogata was using him (at least not any more than he was using the other man), but neither did he thing they had something exclusive. If Ogata, no, _Seiji_ had someone else? Well, that's why he was staying safe.

* * *

Seiji had called him the previous day and Shinichirou hadn't even answered thanks to feeling awful because of a fever. When Yoshitaka had called only a few moments later, Shinichirou had assumed it was Ogata calling once more and answered gruffly, "Did you forget how to masturbate?" The long moment of silence told him he was wrong and Shinichirou pulled the phone away from his ear to check, cursing under his breath. "Sorry. My neighbor and his girlfriend... I didn't think the call had connected yet."

Somehow, that had ended up with Yoshitaka coming over and making him watery rice porridge. Shinichirou had tried to push the words from earlier out of his head, but as Yoshitaka walked around his apartment like he owned the place, Shinichirou couldn't seem to help imagining what the boy looked like as he masturbated. He blamed the fever and thanked Yoshitaka profusely for everything he'd done, and then kicked him out, claiming he wanted to sleep. As soon as the door had closed behind him, Shinichirou called Seiji back. "Look. I've got a fever and I'm probably contagious, but if you want to come over here and fuck me? I'll wear a mask and everything." 

And if images of Yoshitaka's capable hands and his broadening shoulders popped into mind as Seiji thrust into him and hissed out lines about how hot he was, well, Shinichirou blamed that on the fever, too.

* * *

There was a pattern that had formed that Shinichirou only became aware of just after getting notification that he would be advancing to 5-dan. He would see Yoshitaka and then he would call Seiji. Sometimes Seiji would call him and Shinichirou would turn him down because he had errands to run or was about to leave for a teaching session. But if he saw Yoshitaka, he'd see Seiji. The older man never refused him. He might put him off for a few hours, but he would make up for it with the intensity of the sex when they did meet. If it happened that one of them was out of town, they'd talk each other through a long masturbatory session. It was all of the sex Shinichirou thought he'd never be having. 

It wasn't unpleasant to have someone who seemed pretty ready to drop everything to be his temporary bedfellow. It didn't make his heart ache to watch the older man's back as he left. It didn't get boring and he never felt like he wasn't wanted. But it was a little lonely. Having his sheets mussed on both sides of the bed made him feel like someone else should be there. Not Seiji because that wasn't what their relationship was about, but someone who would be good in bed and then be happy to stay, preferably to stay and discuss go.

If Shinichirou were asked the one thing that he disliked most about his relationship with Seiji, it would be that they never talked about go except in the most distant ways. They would mention heading to the Ki-in or that one of them would be off at some tournament, but there was no deep conversation about the way Fujishima 7-dan had resigned only eighteen moves into a match with Shindou or the fact that there was talk of Korea changing their komi again. Shinichirou still got to have those conversations, but they were with Yoshitaka. Between Yoshitaka and Seiji, Shinichirou felt like he was getting everything that movies had promised him were the best parts of a relationship, but Yoshitaka was too young and if he had been interested at all when he was even younger, he wouldn't be now. Shinichirou was sure of it.

* * *

Shinichirou sat in a little cafe only a few blocks from the Ki-in drinking some kind of cold and creamy green tea thing. He'd only purchased it because he was warm. He'd been in front of the Ki-in and Seiji had driven by and it had seemed like a good idea to drive into a parking garage and have a little fun. It had been fun at the time, but he had an ache in his neck now and he was pretty sure he'd dropped a few hundred yen out of his pockets and between the seats of Seiji's car. He knew Seiji was headed to the pet store after this, but he hadn't been invited along and hadn't seen a reason to try to go anyway. 

Besides, the only thing that had crossed his mind to do instead was to call Yoshitaka and make plans to do something, maybe even without Hikaru this time. Only, just as he'd pulled out his phone after sitting down with his drink, he saw them. Yoshitaka was sitting at one of the outside tables with a girl. He recognized her a little, but it took him a moment to place her: Morishita Shigeko. Of course. She was a pretty girl, so Shinichirou wasn't surprised that Yoshitaka would be dating her. She knew about go even if she didn't play and Yoshitaka had even talked sometimes about how the Morishita family made him feel more like he belonged than his real family did. Shinichirou couldn't hate the girl for having the same feelings for Yoshitaka that Shinichirou himself did, but he let himself feel a little envious of her for being the right age and sex to actually do something about her feelings.

When Yoshitaka walked off finally with the girl, Shinichirou stared into the dregs of his drink for a long time. He'd recognized his pattern by now. This was when he'd normally call up Seiji and have sex and take his mind off of where his thoughts were trying to lead him. Since that was where he'd just been, he kept his phone in his pocket and just tried to let his mind go anywhere else. Except everything else still led back to Yoshitaka. His chances in the leagues that year made him wonder when his next game against Yoshitaka would be. Wondering when Touya Akira would get his first title make him wonder what Yoshitaka would say when that did finally happen. Shinichirou picked up his empty cup and deposited it in the proper receptacle before heading out into the street, walking toward his apartment. Sure, he could hop on the train and get there so much faster, but the walk wasn't that bad. At least while walking he wasn't likely to go very far past his place. Right now, on the train, he was more likely to just stand there thinking without paying any attention at all.

* * *

Shinichirou took a deep breath and splashed water on his face, letting it drip off before dabbing at the remainder with a handkerchief. He'd just eked out a win that day. Just barely. But it had been against Yoshitaka and he hadn't been expecting it. Somehow he hadn't seen the game notice come and hadn't followed it up to find out. Granted, it was probably a good thing. That way he hadn't spent too much time dwelling on things he couldn't change. Instead, he spent the whole game having to reread the board every time it was his turn because he'd see Yoshitaka and suddenly the game wasn't nearly as important as the person he was playing it with. For the first time, he could understand why it was that Hikaru never really seemed to care about who won when he played against Akira.

And that scared him.

He was still standing there when Seiji walked in and Shinichirou bit his lip. "Hey. I was about to send you a text."

Seiji smiled at him and Shinichirou felt himself relax a bit until the man's next words. "I got a glimpse of your game. It looked pretty good. No wonder you're going to be a 5-dan in a few days."

"Yeah. Can we maybe just skip the small talk?" Shinichirou knew what he wanted and as much as Seiji might have been a great person to talk go with, it wasn't part of their relationship and hadn't been. Changing that now wasn't part of the unspoken deal. They were something coarse and shady and even though the game hadn't stuck in his mind as much as his opponent had, he didn't want to mix his two worlds now. The hand that suddenly cupped his groin and the mouth that firmly attached itself to his neck soothed him. Actions. No more words. It was something to get lost in and enjoy and he was okay with that.

The whole thing was a whirlwind. He was pushed back against the restroom door as his hands found the buckle of Seiji's pants, working quickly to open them as his own were pushed down. There was a moment of the stall door being swung open and then they were inside and Shinichirou just let himself feel instead of think. It was routine now to pull a condom from his pocket and hand it over, then just bend over, not needing more than a moment to accustom himself to the sensation of Seiji filling him. He'd learned the angle they liked best and discovered just how to move his body to make their coupling something quick. That's what he did now. He didn't need the slow build. The slow build had been the game and watching Yoshitaka's fingers as he placed his stones and the thought that Shinichirou couldn't just knock the stones off of the board and pull Yoshitaka over to kiss him. 

He couldn't say he wasn't enjoying it, but by the time Seiji was thrusting hard into him and grunting as he came, Shinichirou was still just building up to the feelings he needed to get off. "What the-? Oh." 

Shinichirou's heart seemed to freeze, but he forced himself to turn his head and look. Oh, indeed. "Waya. This..." 

Seiji pulled out and Shinichirou could hear the sound of him tying off the condom. "It's exactly what it looks like. But I'm done here. Your turn, I guess." He patted Shinichirou's ass and then there was just Yoshitaka standing there staring at him.

"It's just sex," Shinichirou finally managed to say as he tried to pull his pants up, even though his cock was far more at attention now than it had been only a minute before.

Yoshitaka stepped into the stall and locked the door behind him and Shinichirou felt a lump in his throat, his hands fumbling with the waistband of his pants. "How long?"

Something like fear filled Shinichirou's chest. "About five months. Just... fuck buddies. I think that's what you called it when you talked about someone else doing this."

There was a tremor in the sigh that Yoshitaka let out. "You know, when I turned eighteen, I thought maybe you'd finally realize I was old enough for you. If I'd known that you were just into older guys, maybe I would have given up and actually gone out with someone else. But, I thought we'd been flirting back and forth for years and that you were just waiting for something. Even if you just wanted sex, didn't you think I'd be happy to give that to you?!"

It rocked Shinichirou to the core. He sat on the toilet and just stared at Yoshitaka as his brain tried to catch up. "Wait. I didn't... I couldn't... You actually want to be with me?"

Yoshitaka rolled his eyes and moved closer to Shinichirou, walking like he was stalking prey. "You're an idiot. If Shindou wasn't head over heels for the brat, I'd say the two of you should be together. I guess it's just my luck that I like idiots. Now, you have two choices: think about Kurata-sensei eating and pull up your pants, or pull them back down and let me get a taste of what I've been missing."

Shinichirou stood up and fumbled in his pocket for a moment, pulling out another condom. "I've always used these, so there shouldn't be any worry. This one's cherry so that'll be what you'll taste." He felt brash and impulsive and horrible, but he was also kind of really turned on in a somewhat uncomfortable way and he wasn't going to turn Yoshitaka down.

Taking hold of the condom, Yoshitaka grinned. "I'm not all that fond of the taste of fake cherries, you know." He took a deep breath. "Can you come from being fucked?"

"Y-yeah." Shinichirou swallowed after his voice seemed to just falter in the face of the fact that Yoshitaka seemed willing to do this, to just take care of him right after Seiji had been fucking him. "You don't mind?"

The sound of Yoshitaka's snort seemed to echo. "Do I mind finally getting to make my dreams come true?" He opened his own pants, pulling down his underwear to reveal his erection. "I'll admit that this isn't how I imagined it going, but I'm still pretty happy to take this title away from Ogata-sensei. I never expected you to wait for me, really, so I guess I'm just happy that it was just sex because if there were feelings... There weren't, right?"

"There were feelings," Shinichirou said as he stood up and took the condom back from Yoshitaka, opening it and sliding it carefully down Yoshitaka's cock. "They were just for you. Now, how about we get on with this so I can be calm enough to freak out later at my apartment." He let his pants drop again and turned to face his ass toward Yoshitaka, leaning over against the wall.

Yoshitaka wasted no time in pressing into him and it was perfect in its imperfection as he got a crash course in rhythm and where his mouth could actually reach in this position. When he wrapped his fingers around Shinichirou's cock, one stroke was all it took to make him cry out, coming against the tiled wall only a second later. Yoshitaka's cries echoed his own and there was an easiness to the whole thing that appealed to Shinichirou. Yoshitaka leaned against him for a while and Shinichirou found himself grasping one of Yoshitaka's hands and wrapping it around his stomach. "You know, I've been meaning to ask you about moving in. Your apartment's a little small."

Pulling away with a huff of breath, Yoshitaka worked on pulling his pants back up. "Well, since you need someone new to be at your beck and call... You are cutting things off with Ogata-sensei, right?"

Shinichirou nodded, grabbing a length of toilet paper to use to clean up the wall. "Yes. Of course. That was fun while it lasted, but this, with you? I'm too happy to have it to even dare do anything to mess it up. I think I've already done enough."

"Well, yeah." Yoshitaka grinned and pulled out his phone to check the time. "Hey, there's a cafe not too far from here that has some awesome cake. Morishita-sensei's daughter likes to force all of the young guys in his study group to take her out for cake when we do well. I don't know how Shindou manages to say 'no' to her except that I'm not sure he even notices when she asks. I'd mind a little more but no one looks at me funny for getting cake if I'm with her."

"Okay." Shinichirou brushed his hair away from his forehead, glad that everything was straightening itself out and falling into place. Yoshitaka was the chuuban stone that came out of nowhere to claim dominance in the end and Shinichirou couldn't be happier about it.


End file.
